Three or four?! How hard can it be to count to four properly?

What do I do when I encounter a toy that looks like an ice pick? Fuck her like there's no tomorrow?

It's a damn funny name for a country, but yeah, it can be nethery here, with mists coming either from the North Sea or the rivers or ze Germany, or my bedroom.

Trust me, I look and look and the most interesting thing I found at one lady's place was a lesbian movie collection. I immediately borrowed some stuff and that was a hoot. Never do I see toys. They hide them well or they don't have them, or they hide them in plain sight, which is the best of hiding places, as Hitchcock rightly said. Darn, that odd-shaped vase... Yeah... It was right in front of me all the time. I remember...

Tomorrow I have a date with a lady. Being realistic, I don't count on sleeping with her right away and being able to check her closets and drawers and under the bed, but I'll try to unlock her secrets as to toys. Heck, she mentioned porn, so maybe this time I found someone who's into toys. The two seem related...

My sexual life gets more depraved by the month. I'll end up like Spam, with toys to pass the time or whatever he's doing. I guess watch as the ladies please themselves while he balloons up? You know what, I don't want to know.

I confess I didn't dare ask whether she has a toy, but I will do so next time. She is, I must admit, darn kinky. I am lucky to have survived the night.