Now I think I know why McCain has such short arms: that blonde wife of his no doubt ties him to the bed posts real good every night (to make sure he won't crawl to the toilet at inconvenient moments). Oh, wait – no, that should lengthen his arms, right? Well, maybe she is trying to achieve just that, so that he can serve his own needs instead of drooling all over her. She doesn’t want to be bothered with that, maybe. What she needs is lots of time to shop for pearls, fur coats, and more of such stuff, with her chattering (and old) lady friends, who all boast hairdos that resemble dried grass. "Oh, look, (insert name of your choice); the diamonds are 50% off this week. They go so well with that blouse I bought just now."