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The Atheist's Nightmare: Bananas

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The Atheist's Nightmare: Bananas
Ray Comfort and Kirk Cameron -- former child actor and star of the tv series, "Growing Pains" -- have a message for us.

"Never again do you need to be intimidated by an atheist.

Learn how to prove God's existence and effectively witness to these so-called 'intellectuals'." Here is a sample from one of their videos involving a banana.
Apr 24, 2006 4:32 AM
Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Possibly the worst arguement for the existance of a God that I've ever heard.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Really? Even worse than "because I just know"?
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
'I just know' is a pretty poor answer empirically, but it at least concedes to a lack of solid proof.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
At least refer to the complex workings of the human eye or brain or something.
I mean, come on.
"It's got a good grip, there must be a God!"
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
God made Goodyear tires too
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
I don't know, I kind of like the argument. I can think of other phallic shaped things that god made that fit well in mouths. Then again, seeing that guy and that banana, I might have spoke to soon.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
EXACTLY!!!

Why dont our own "human bananas" have 5 ridges if "god" is so obsessed with ergonomics?

and why did he hide all the gold and diamonds so that only people with a lot of resources (i.e. wealthy people; greed = sin) can get to it?
By: gypo
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Can I borrow your shovel?
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Because God doesn't want you touching yourself and you're going to hell.
By: JRock
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
I half expected him to make refrences to this as well.. :D
By: Skullpop
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Maybe his god is a monkey.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
You know, I've got my own spirituality, and one of the reasons why I don't call myself an atheist is because of fruit. Fruit tastes TOO GOOD to not think there's either some sort of perfect evolution of it, or some sort of gnostic hand in the whole thing.

Having said that, I am now an atheist. That pud has single-handedly convinced me that a god who would make such a perfect food would surely strike this guy dead as well.

God would also kill him with that banana if I had my say.

Hopefull in a completely undignified way to find the corpse.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Good work Ray, I will never look at another banana again.. that made me feel very dirty. Frickin' devotee's. Bah! I say.. Bah!
By: Spacenut
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
I wonder how they explain the Durian?

http://www.ambrosiasw.com/~andrew/durian/
By: biggeek
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
The durian is the tool of the devil! It was made to refute banannas and God, to sway weak minds into selfish means! Now let us sing two hymns and pass the collection plate.
By: Szech
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Ray Comfort rubbing his hand up and down a banana and talking about ease of entry?
That certainly is an atheist's nightmare! Heck, that's anybody's nightmare.
By: Chumpsky
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
The Religious Freaks nightmare?.... The coconut. Way to fuck that one up god.
By: lyzard
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
You're telling me you don't have the apendage growing from between your shoulder blades with the crab claw on it, made to open the coconut perfectly?

Damn it. I knew my mom was lying when she said we all have one.

::opens coconuts::
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
maybe god didn't intend humans to use the coconut till they had developed the straw? :P
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Coconuts are used by heathens. Missionaries have the duty of turning those poor souls towards bananas.

Unfortunately, coconuts have captured hearts and minds, and convinced otherwise upright humans to take them to Christian nations. There, they are consumed with alcohol and pineapple (Another ungodly fruit with poor ergonomics) to intoxicate good men and women and lead them to a life of vice. It's all in Revelation.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Makes sense to me. Bananas are the only fruit that conform to the specific needs of your mouth.
By: ByteBaron
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Bananas are the only fruit that conform to the specific needs of your mouth
Especially after countless generations of sharp tuning through selective breeding and genetic modification in order to acquire perfectly shaped crops which ripen quickly and open easily!
Wild bananas come in all shapes and sizes and really fux up this dude's argument... But I'm preaching to the choir.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Had wild bananas in Southeast Asia. They were 3in. long and had big seeds. God must think different over there.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
BUT...

a banana ISN'T a FRUIT...

ITS A HERB!
By: gypo
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
I had an Uncle Herb who was a fruit.
By: lyzard
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
hahaaa
By: gypo
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Well technically the banana plant is an herb that produces the fruit.
By: MSM8
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
What a bunch of bullshit. A nightmare, yes. But the banana "theory" is not what is the nightmare...It is Ray himself with the agreeable Kirk, that is the "mare"...Night or day.

By the way, have you ever tried to peel the banana from the top like Ray says. I have had half of my bananas get mushed because it is so damn hard to do. Instead, I flip that bastard and open from the bottom. It seems easier, and you can remove that little black thing on the bottom.

---KMA...



By: Chenz
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
NooooooooO!

That's the DEVIL's way of peeling it!
By: barnacle
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
LOL...


Well, since there is no God and No Devil....There's no problem...

By: Chenz
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
They open easily foe ALL Gods children. And your problrm is.....?
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
My pull tab always falls off :( . Then, I get my fingers (on loan from God) all sticky as I reach into the fruit to peel off the skin.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
I didn't realize bananas were so important for humans in the Garden of Eden, or Mesopotamia... Bananas are more associated with... monkeys and apes... who have the same grooves on their hands to fit bananas... as if they were designed for each other... Wait, why do we have those grooves too, when we don't eat as many bananas? Could it be? No...
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I'd like to see him explain this...
Oh really? Bananas are proof that god exists?
Then explain this one, smartass:
Lightning kills 5 Mexican children in prayer
Youths between 9 and 16 die praying at metal cross in central Mexico
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/12467604/?GT1=7938

By: decavolt
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Re: I'd like to see him explain this...
DID THEY HAVE BANANAS, Smartass?
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
My question is, based on this argument, why aren't more people sticking bananas in their derrieres? Wait... or is that proof of the existence of Satan?
By: Overmann
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
sorry about the ads, but if this doesn't scream god to you, I don't know what will:

http://www.fundumper.com/cool/worlds-largest-banana-display.htm
By: lyzard
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Oh yea. nothin' but a fallic lookin edible food turned into gay mans yellow wet dream...


This it too much God for me....LOL
By: Chenz
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Even if a banana did seem perfectly "designed" for human use, evolution can still explain it. The entire point of any fruit is that animals eat them. Plants use the animals, because they offer them the fruit, and the animals take it and spread the plant's seeds so it can reproduce. Animals and plants evolved alongside one another. The banana has evolved over millions of years to make itself as tasty and appealing (excuse the pun) to animals as possible, so that they will take the fruits, eat them, and spread the seeds. If an inferior banana came along, perhaps one that did not have ridges and wasn't as easy to hold, the animals would prefer the ridged banana over this slippery one, and natural selection would allow the superior banana to reproduce more.
By: zammo
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
I've heard arguments like this before. They usually come from potheads who argue that plants that alter your head come from nature and therefore it's going against nature not to use them. Or something like that.

It's kinda like saying nature made poison sumac for toilet paper, and not using it is going against nature. I'm sure you could sell the idea to anyone who'd buy this video.

Thoughts for Today (you listening, Kirk?):
1) Nature is responsible not only for the wonder of the banana but also the joys of hemlock.
2) Neither one can be used to prove intelligent design. Duh.
3) If you need bananas to argue your case, you can rule out intelligent design.
4) You even think of paving over that countryside for one of those megawarehouse church things, I'll personally help you out with where else that banana fits, pal.
5) Everyone knows man was created to serve the banana.
6) Send some of those perfectly designed HERRRRRBS over to your ex-costar, Tracey. I hear she needs something to eat.
7) If I were your costar, it'd put me off food, too.
8) I've never heard of Ray Comfort until now. How embarrassing, Ray.
9) Is this all the result of being around Alan Thicke too much? Methinks so...
10) Kirk, you had a chance to tell Ray he was out of his mind, and you blew it. Pick up your paycheck, move to Oregon and start your cult with the rhubarbs. Your credibility, shaky as it was, is GONE.

That felt good. Totally. Thank you, and good night.
By: spyplanex
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
CRAP! What you been smokin'? Did you even read your post before you posted it? I say again: CRAP! What you been smokin'?
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
it would only need a few slight changes to make that an argument for blow jobs.
By: Rainy
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Blooow Jobs! Blooow Jobs! Blooow Jobs!

Yippee!

I think Gods best invention for man is Atheism....hehe
By: Chenz
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Umm...On the receiving end that is....


Me likes it!!!
By: Chenz
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
I really dont know where to start on this one.... but I do know that this had to be the most laughable attempt by any christian to prove their religion.
By: EvilFicus
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
This impeaches religion on the grounds of Darwinism, seeing that bananas are synonymous with apes and monkeys... and as for the mouth thing, I bet this bloke likes a good cock... rofl
By: gorf
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
That was hilarious! I never though Kirk Cameron would be nodding so happily to so phallic an object. I guess we know who the fruit is.
~Wait... Does that mean that Kirk is also perfectly made for consumption, with five ridges on his...
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
lol, he opend the banana wrong! if you look at any monkey or ape, they open it from the bottom end (opposite of the stem) which if you try, its much easier. why would god make only us open it the hard way!? pff dumb... debunked!
By: cryo
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Intelligent design? More like Not Intelligent Design. Am I right? Am I right? High Five!

My proof theres a god? Water! Easy to drink, easy to pass, practically falls from the sky. Water Rules! High five!
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
He must have picked up a banana that morning and made that up.... what a joke!!

I think he is the devil, he made a poor argument/point of why there must be a god to let everyone sway into dispute.
Now we are at a 45 comment war of why he is a dumbass and pondering if there really is a god.

Its like when Peter G. (of family guy) sees the bag being carried in the wind......
A BANANA?? leave bananas to missy elliot - What about the circulatory system!!
By: Giorgieoh
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
high five! ha ha


ah wonder showzen... :P
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
I think the only thing this proves is that we're all a bunch of talking monkeys with big egos. I don't think we're at a level where we can comprehend a God. I think we monkeys will obliterate ourselves before we ever get to that level.

I think we should all eat a banana and just go with the flow. Maybe we could fling some poo as well.

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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Good point. This would be hilarious mashed up with The Jungle Book.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
in the photo i host seems to be enjoying it alittle too much. sick freak.
By: sledge
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Okay, now how about a banana that doesn't NEED a peel in the first place; one which pests and bacteria magically avoid? How about a banana that is ALWAYS ripe, so you don't need color to indicate whether or not it's good to eat? For that matter, how about a banana that FEEDS ITSELF TO YOU? Surely an omnipotent god could have designed such a fruit. :)

And how about a banana which didn't need thousands of years of cultivation BY HUMANKIND (mostly non-Christian humankind, I might add) to reach its present "perfect" form?
By: quisph
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Case in point. Here's a picture of some "perfect" wild bananas, as God made them:

http://tinyurl.com/htmlp
By: quisph
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
I'd like to see this jackass fuck around with a coconut for an hour and a half.
By: PapaTenor
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
Indeed, a banana will fit many places. This doesn't mean you should stick them every place they fit.

The fact they are edible and many people agree they taste good is a good argument that bananas are for eating, but considering how few fruits are shaped like bananas that aren't bananas, the only people I believe this argument would convince are those who already believe in God, and those who are uncommonly gullible.
By: Limn42
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare
There have been texts found stating that the Banana was the forbidden fruit from Eden. So, humans should never have touched it.
Now why in hell would a supreme being make something you are forbidden to eat so ergonomical and handy?
Religion walks hand in hand with contradiction.
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Re: The Atheist's Nightmare: Bananas
hahaha! if god is man maybe he made the banana in his image too!

this one balances the arguement...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzXMyDd3WOw

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